“What we have here is a failure to communicate.” This expression sums up exchanges we have throughout our day. Why does this expression resonate with so many?
Some think communication is transferring a precise piece of
information from one mind to another. Have you had data, or a conclusion; you
felt so strongly about that all you had to do was explain your finding and
people instantly saw your point of view? How did that work for you…not so well?
- Let
others talk. My favorite
acronym is WAIT--Why am I talking?
By waiting and letting others speak first we are able to learn
much. How do they like to communicate? Do they speak in short sentences with specific
facts? Do they tell stories
and ramble? Are they
controlled and unexpressive or do they use their hands and many facial
expressions? These are all
clues on how you should communicate with them. By allowing people to speak first, your comments will
be more effective and better received.
- Listen. God gave us two ears and one
mouth; I suggest we use them proportionately. You must work at
listening…concentrate; get the information the first time. Good listeners do not jump to
conclusions; they listen for ideas not just facts. Keep your mind open…hold emotion
in check. Take notes and
adjust to the speaker. Judge
content, not delivery and listen optimistically.
- Create
an open atmosphere. Notice
the first two items were pertaining to receiving not sending. Communication is a two-way
process, sending and receiving.
Many focus only on the sending portion. In order to be a great communicator, you must build a
climate of openness and trust.
You do this by having mutual respect and the results will follow.
- Non-verbal
communication. Eye contact. Smiling, nodding your head,
appropriate facial expressions or body language all let the person know
you are paying attention.
Repeat what the other person says by using, “If I understand you
correctly…” Seek first to understand, and then be understood.
- The
Golden Rule says, “Do unto others as you would do unto yourself.” A fine sentiment, however, in the
21st century the “World is Flat”. Realize the cultural, multi-generational and
personality differences of the people you’re speaking with. Use the philosophy of “Do unto
others as they would do unto themselves.”
The rewards of being a good communicator will directly
influence your ability to lead; you will empower others to excel by clearly and
effectively communicating.
CoachAnovick.com
Developing Potential, Producing Results
201-445-2822
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